My first class.
I have been watching the UFC and other MMA events since the Forrest Griffin/Stephan Bonner fight. I had a college professor who went to high school with Stephan, so when he told us about the TUF final, I tuned in…and was hooked. I have only missed a few cards since. This is how my interest was peaked in bjj. I had never heard of it before listening to Joe Rogan talk about it during the bouts. I remember Royce Gracie from the original UFC events, but was too young to understand much about it. I have wanted to train in bjj for a year or two now, and finally got my chance recently. Because law school demands so much of my time, I have not been able to exercise much…which means weight gain. So, I come to bjj as intrigued about where it comes from and what it is, but I also want to get it better shape and drop a few pounds. I despise cardio and have never been that strong in weight training. I am an okay athlete. I love to read and learn, and love football and mma. Thus, bjj seemed the best fit for me. Though I am not a little guy – 6’1” and 245 pounds or so, I have no previous fighting experience…heck, I’ve never even been in a real fight. Though not the smallest, I am not really strong, but I enjoy learning and understand steep learning curves (law school), so bjj always seemed the right fit for me.
The class: After deciding to quit talking about training in bjj and actually find a school and train, I typed in bjj Montgomery, Alabama and up pops ‘Cheung’s Taekwondo’. I found some of their bjj videos on youtube as well and looked up information on the instructor and was satisfied, so I went yesterday and joined up. I immediately noticed that I was one of the biggest framed guys there (10 to 15 of us total). I also was the only one who looked overweight and out of shape. Everyone I talked to seemed really nice and helpful. The instructor, Chris, is a Christian missionary, and there are other ministers in the class, so the atmosphere is positive and one of support. There are a lot of MMA fighters who train out of this school as well, which is exciting to me because I am quite the MMA fanatic. So, I pay, sign the agreement and waiver, and we’re off…
We cleaned the mats, stretched some, and began….running?? Crap! This is so not my thing…but I participate. As we finish the first lap, Chris yelled stop. Nearly crashing into the person in front of me…I managed to stop. He then yelled something that sounded like English, everyone else understood it, but I had no clue what he was talking about. Everyone dropped and began doing a bizarre version of what looked like push-ups…so I joined in…sort of. I had no clue what or why I was trying to do this movement, but by the time I get comfortable with it (meaning maybe I didn’t look so stupid then), we were back up and running. This progresses for about 25 minutes or so. A classmate saw me struggling and tried to help, but for about half of the drills I just told her that I understood what to do, but my body just doesn't move that way! So we continued...running, dropping, doing some bizarre movements that I attempt but never really get close to doing correctly, then up and running again. I wanted cardio…I got it, and we’re not even rolling yet! As we finished our first portion of the class, these thoughts, among many, came to me: Pouring sweat…out of shape…I look stupid…can’t breathe…that was the warm-up??...need water…ugh, think I’m going to be sick… So, I exit the training area with the others, get some water, go into the bathroom, splash water on my face and stare at myself…half dead already. “Dear God…that was the warm-up. I am about to die! Ugh…I already paid for the month…back I go.”
By the time I returned, Chris was already showing the class what we’d being doing next: a method to pass half-guard and get into side control. After watching the demonstration 3 times or so, I knew I didn’t really have it yet. While trying to keep each of the many steps of the demonstration in my mind, it felt like the water pumps on the Titanic…it just wasn’t happening. So, partners. I get paired with a new blue belt. Ryan. Nice guy. Seems very knowledgeable. He walks me through the demonstration and explains what to do and why we are doing it. Chris comes over a few times to help out as well. All is well up to this point, but one particular part of the maneuver entails my hugging my partners waist as I squeeze his legs together…dangerously close to the man zone… I didn’t have a lot of big snafus there, so we go on to the next drill: taking the new side-control position and getting a submission from it – either a kimora or an armbar…
So, this drill entails steping over the head of the opponent...yes...that means butt and man eggs in the face...fun times. I learned how to properly lock my hands and the leverage to apply for a kimora. No real snafus again...rolling time!
I initially get paired with Ryan again...we have a similar frame, so it makes sense. I bought and have been reading the book "Jiu Jitsu University" and it has a very simple but great tenent for all begginers: the main goal is to.....wait for it....SURVIVE!! Well...for my first time...I have no clue what I am doing...I know the names of the positions and what many of the submissions look like, but can't really physically do them and don't know how to defend against them really. I.E. I am a living and breathing punching bag...but, I only get subed like 2 or 3 times...a win to me...I tried to create space, did the best I could...the alarm goes off...the first 5 minute round is over. Back come the thoughts...tired...puke?...I have all my appendages intact at least...I sit out the second round and rest because I am about to freaking die...and there was an uneven number of us, so it's all good.
Third and final round: I walked into the gym late...used bathroom, so the pairings were almost over. I get paired with a guy who is at least 100 pounds lighter than me...maybe more and at least 6 inches shorter than me...maybe more. But I was tired and have no clue what level this guy is at...we shake hands and I tell him my name and that it was my first day...so if I should tap and don't know it...tell me...I need both arms and legs!! Off we go...we are standing up this time (last time, we started on our knees...). I shoot for a quick takedown...I learned last time that when I'm on the bottom, bad things happen...not that I am any better on the top. Genius here leaves his head unprotected...guillotine choke...tap in like 5 seconds tops. I would have been embarrased, but I saw this happen to Jens Pulver in his last fight in like the first 30 seconds, and he is a veteran in mma.
Back to our feet again. This time my opponent shoots and gets a single leg takedown...but he falls right into a perfect set up for a triangle choke...my favorite from watching mma. I actually sort of know how this is supposed to look and some theory on it, but have never actually tried it. I throw my leg over his back and and trapped arm, cross my leg over my leg thrown over his back and pull down on the head. OMG...I am thinking...I might actually pull this off...on my FIRST night. His eyes get big as he realizes he is pretty deep in this choke and he says "oh...".
But...I quickly learn that I am not even close to flexible enough to get the choke in fully...it was tight, but not tight enough. I should have grabbed his arm instead of his head, pull it and pivot my hips to the side...darn it...but I pull down on his head...he finally slips out, but at least 1 minute and 30 seconds was spent in this position...so I had someone else in trouble for a while...woot...but now the scramble is on...when he pops out of the triangle attempt, he tries to pass my guard, so I scramble around too and put him on his back somehow...all happened so fast...adrenaline....I have him in side control and put my weight on him...I try to do the leg over head, catch the kimora movement, but since we all just worked it, and that is literally ALL I know, I am not able to do it. I ask him, after stuffing a few of his escape attempts...I say "I have no clue what to do now!" He says, for your first class, just try to hold the position and you are doing well...so I put my weight down and do so...the round ends...I actually did well...although it was against someone I had like half a foot on and like 100 to 150 pounds on...YAY!!! I only got submitted once and almost pulled one off myself!!!
Geez...tired....again...I go get my shoes and keys, get a drink of water and start to leave, and notice that half the class has started sparring in kick-boxing after our bjj class ended... How the heck do they have any energy left...dear lord...
4 days later...that is the best workout I have ever had...my entire body ached for 4 days. Friday (today) was the first day that I could actually walk and sit down without my legs screaming in pain from soreness... Not only is this the most sore I have ever been, but it I am sore in places and ways that I haven't been sore in before...
I am finally ready for class # 2....
BJW
